You have the strangest conversations with your other half when you become parents!
Quite apart from chatting quite openly about nappy contents, nipple soreness and loss of bladder control a whole new topic of conversation comes into play and becomes an integral part of your everyday life.
Names of toys!
And not just toys but also names of cartoon characters, children's TV presenters and general assorted critters!
It's a whole new language that only you, as a couple, understand and somehow it makes sense.
I'll give you an example and it was at this point I knew we were lost to the joys of parenthood forever.
We have some animal finger puppets the boy loves and to amuse him, and us, we play The Apprentice with them. I know it sounds strange but bear with me caller.
I put five on one hand as the candidates and then three on the other as Nick, Karen and most importantly the main man himself, Lord Alan Sugar! The variety of animals can change depending upon what I can lay my hands on but Lord Sugar is always the rather grand and imposing tiger finger puppet that, quite frankly, looks a bit like him! As Lord "Tiger" Sugar fires each candidate the finger puppet flies off my hand and into the air inducing fits of giggles from the boy.
Are you still with me? (get some from Ikea and give it a try, it's great fun I promise).
So the boy had gone to bed and hubby was tidying away the toys for the day (all the time searching for the STFU button!). He turns to tidy the finger puppets but there's no tiger.
"Where's Alan Sugar?" he asks as I recline on the sofa.
"Just there between Barbara and Dee Li " I say pointing to where Sir Alan was snuggled between a white lamb and a pink pussy cat from Waybuloo.
And it made perfect sense. No one else would've had a clue what we were on about.
But then thinking about it that's nothing new?